Last week was a mostly banner week for us here at the Quirken Loans Gambling Corner. I posted a 4-1 week to bring my record to 16-8-1 on the year. Though, I did suffer my first defeat on Whammies as Army decided they didn’t have interest in playing football on Saturday, while the Citadel Bulldogs turned into the ’85 Bears. Still, I am 4-1 in Whammies this year, and going to get back on the right track this week.
Miami Dolphins -9.5 vs. New York Jets
Sunday 4:05 p.m.
I did not think I would see a “Dolphins -9.5” line this year, and I DEFINITELY did not think if I saw one that I would be taking it. The Fins are coming off of a 43-17 drumming of the San Francisco 49ers out on the West Coast. Ryan Fitzpatrick was excellent and the Miami defense forced three turnovers, while maybe ending Jimmy G’s time in the Bay Area.
The Jets on the other hand are just a disaster. They are the only winless team in the NFL against the spread, standing at 0-5. They’re also 0-5 straight-up, as well, with things expected to get worse with Leveon Bell now in Kansas City. Both quarterback Sam Darnold and left tackle Mekhi Becton are not expected to play on Sunday, and with a perceived mutiny already underway in the locker room, this one looks to be on pace for a bloodbath. Take the Aquatic Mammals and lay the points.
Green Bay Packers -1 vs. Tampa Bay Buccaneers
Sunday 4:25 p.m.
I know what you’re thinking. Tom Brady played a Thursday night game, so that’s a few extra days to prepare. But the Packers are fresh off a bye in their own right, so even more time to get ready for their Showdown in the Sunshine State.
Aaron Rodgers was written off by hoards of angry virgins on Twitter all offseason for being over-the-hill. The incompetent Packers front office seemed to agree as they traded up in the first round to draft Utah State project quarterback Jordan Love. Since then, my man Rodgers has been on a massive f*** you tour across the NFL. The Pack are 4-0 with Rodgers passing for over 300 yards per game, 13 touchdowns, and accounting for zero turnovers. Add in the fact Aaron Jones is averaging close to six yards per rush, and they are getting Davante Adams back, and everything is coming up green. Take the cheese, take the brats, take the Pack -1.
Ole Miss -2.5 vs. Arkansas
Saturday 3:30 p.m.
Speaking of f*** you tours, Ole Miss head coach Lane Kiffin is on a rampage at the moment. He took over a Rebels team that was anemic throwing the ball last season, and now has them averaging over 40 points per game against the likes of Florida, Kentucky, and Alabama. Quarterback Matt Corral has been nothing short of sensational in 2020, throwing for well over 300 yards per game, adding almost 50 on average on the ground, as well.
Arkansas attempted to hire Kiffin only to be spurned at the last moment. Their fallback in Sam Pittman has them playing exponentially better football this season with the help of two top-notch coordinators in Kendal Briles and Barry Odom. The Pigs played with UGA for a half, took down Mike Leach and the Bulldogs, before almost (and frankly should have) pulling out a win against Auburn.
Kiffin said one of the reasons he chose the Rebels was of the personnel they have on offense. Arkansas has a solid passing game, but that adage of “they’ve got the horses” will prove too much for the Razorbacks on Saturday. The Rebels win it by at least a field goal.
Friday 6:00 p.m.
Tulane is an over machine. Twice this season, they’ve combined for 90 points. Offensive coordinator Will Hall is a hot name in the industry and will have a head job soon enough. SMU on the other hand is fresh off a win over Memphis and combined for 115 points in the two weeks prior to that contest.
All we need in this one is a 34-31 ballgame, and that seems to be easy pickings for a pair of offenses that sport excellent quarterback play and a pair of defenses leaving quite a bit to be desired. Tulane loves to hit overs, and either of these teams are capable of hitting it on their own. It’s Friday Night Lights, baby, and just like the afterparty, there’s going to be some scoring.
WHAMMY: Texas A&M -6.5 vs. Mississippi State
Saturday 4:00 p.m.
I mentioned the mutiny in the Jets locker room earlier in this piece, but that falls drastically short of what the hell is happening in Starkville. Mike Leach sold out his team after a 24-2 embarrassment in Lexington last week, and sources inside the state have said it did not play well internally. Leach is already an off guy, and his noose tweet from the offseason did not get things off on the right foot. Couple that with losses to Arkansas and Kentucky in recent weeks, an unsuccessful quarterback change, and not involving their best player Kylin Hill into the offense, and you have a disaster.
Meanwhile, Jimbo Fisher and the Aggies are fresh off their biggest win of the Fisher era in College Station, knocking off No. 4 Florida. Kellen Mond looked excellent and the abundance of star recruits finally began to show themselves at Kyle Field. All we need is a touchdown here, and the Aggies are catching an inferior team at the absolute best time. I don’t think this one is close. Cue the male cheerleaders, it’s Gig ‘Em time.